


Afraid

by Khirs



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, Trapped, pre-webseries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-02
Updated: 2015-04-02
Packaged: 2018-03-20 20:43:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3664281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Khirs/pseuds/Khirs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carmilla muses as she spends another day trapped under the Earth. What a strange tale theirs has become.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Afraid

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to vermillion-vertigo on Tumblr who suggested the song "Afraid" by The Neighbourhood. I hope you aren't too disappointed with this one-shot!

_How long have I been here?_

As time dragged by, the coffin had grown smaller, the torture more intense. I could feel cracks forming in my mind, and if I believed I had a heart still, if I believed I still had a soul, it would have been fractured a long time ago. I was splintering, and it was becoming increasingly more difficult to keep myself together.

_Mother, how could you?_

_Mother, where are you? The darkness… I’m so afraid._

The days had blurred into weeks and weeks into months into years. What were a few decades to an immortal creature meant to scourge the earth anyway? What was a human lifespan to me?

I wished for a dreamless sleep more than anything else, but I existed in a constant fear that Ell would appear behind my closed lids horrified by my face and desperate for rescue from _me_ of all. I tried to be the hero, I tried to save her, but I failed.

_I’m so sorry, Ell._

I wanted to hate her. I spent the first ten years trapped in here hating her for what she did. Mother tortured me almost to my limits, and oh how I hated them _both_ for how they’d treated me, for how they’d betrayed me.

You fall in love one time and everyone wants to crucify you.

I wondered what the cities looked like, the dresses, the stars…

Oh how I longed to see the stars again. I needed to see how they moved again; I desired more than even seeing Ell again to look up at the sky and see the twinkling cosmic fireflies lighting up the darkness.

But I was in a coffin for, presumably, eternity. I betrayed Mother, Ell betrayed me, Mother betrayed both of us. How strange this tale has become.

I should have never gone to that ball. I wished I was dead, not for the first time. The earth pressed on me from all sides as if it had known all along I should have been dead years ago; I could feel it wanting to swallow me and put me in my rightful place- buried under generations living and dying and walking over me.

Sometimes I made up stories about how the world was outside of my torture chamber. People were falling in love and falling apart. There was dancing, oh how there was dancing. There were so many elegant parties to attend and champagne to sip. I remembered the way the bubbles burst on my tongue and danced all the way down my throat like bubbling fire. I wondered what people were like now. Which generation was ruling the world out there?

I missed the sound of voices, even my own voice. I couldn’t open my mouth for fear of _it_ rushing in and filling my lungs. Not that it would matter, but it would only add to the torment.

I wanted to bang my fists against the side of the coffin, but I couldn’t move. There were a lot of things I couldn’t do.

Days passed.

Weeks passed.

The ground began to tremble. Screaming in protest, the earth around me began to shift and move and _break_. Splintering sounds filled my ears now like heaven, like something beautiful and exceptional for someone so undeserving of it such as myself.

I blinked, the blood around me cooling rapidly to my skin. When did the air get grey? Smoke filled my lungs now, and I felt the air swirling around me, heat, _life_ , _death._

Oh dear merciful stars.

I was **freed**.


End file.
